I remember you when you were a little kid. You were always so happy. Dougie was the the tortured one. But you were just full of smiles and light all the time.
“The Washington Globe has just learned that, Thomas J. Hammond, son of former president Donald Hammond and secretary of state Elaine Barrish, was taken to George Washington Hospital last december after an apparent suicide attempt. Thomas was admitted to the emergency room at 11:15pm on december 22nd, under the pseudo name of Aaron Reid; and treated immediately for high levels of carbon monoxide poisoning. The report is the latest unfortunate event in the troubled life, of the former first son.”
“Beautiful creatures, aren’t they? Majestic, fearsome, but still gentle. They move slower than most animals, but they travel just as far. But that isn’t what I love most about them. They’re a matriarchal society. And when the males reach their mating age, the females kick them the hell out of the herd.”
“The next time you touch me, I’m gonna rip off your tiny shriveled balls and serve them to you in a cold borscht soup.”